Hellooooo, Everybody!
It's Monday. It's Monday, and I don't know what to do with
my little non-missionary adult self yet.
Open scene.
It's Wednesday.
You trip out of the airplane, too excited to remember not to
step on the hem of your skirt. You are, after all, still a missionary. You're
still wearing a skirt. Right.
You walk out and look for your companion in a momentary
panic (where did she go? President is going to kill me!) before you realize
that you're not actually a missionary for much longer; you flew home alone, and
you don't have a companion to keep tabs on anymore. Right.
You wonder whether you should text your family and let them
know where you are. You realize you don't have a phone. You wonder why it
doesn't bother you that you don't have a phone, then you remember! You were the
designated driver the last two transfers, you companion always had the phone.
Right.
Carefully you proceed alone and without a phone into a crowd
of strangers. They all had to pass airport security to get in here, right? They
can't be that dangerous. You look both ways more carefully than you ever did
when you were jay-walking in the streets of Baltimore. Oh, the irony. An
airport in the Sunny Valley, more threatening than Baltimore? Yep, definitely
pre-post-missionary confusion.
Remember, you're still a missionary. It's not
post-missionary confusion yet.
You look past the tall guy with the flowery travel pillow
around his neck and notice the signs pointing to the Celestial Kingdom? No,
just the baggage claim. Sounds like heaven to me, heaven is wherever my family
is.
Note to self: you really need to sleep when you get home so
that you can read words properly again.
That flight was so long, but the flight was done in no time
compared to the excruciatingly slow descent down the escalator. You see your
family for a split second before they spot you. They spot you, and you quickly
remember why you're the quietest one in your family. Your mom scoops you
up almost before you get off of the escalator, who knows where your luggage
went and who cares?! Hopefully one of your siblings took it, and not the guy
with the flowery neck pillow.
There is a hurricane in the Salt Lake City Airport, and you
are in the eye of it, the world moving so quickly around you that you can
barely keep track of it all. You get the best hugs and you feel a pang that your
dad isn't there to hug you too and you grin and laugh as your 6'1" little
brother sweeps you clean off of your feet into a bear hug and you try to be
happy that your little sister is taller than you (you are now the runt of the
family), and you feel a crazy combination of elated, exhausted, ecstatic, and
homesick, because your heart is held very much captive by the beautiful people
at the departure end of that 747 you just disembarked. Home will never be just one
place again.
One thing they don't tell you about is how tired you will be. Your legs tremble to support your weary frame as you embrace the last
uncle. Your fingers fail to grasp strongly the hand of your stake president as
he thanks you for your service and tells you to take off your name tag by
midnight.
Close scene.
I still feel like I'm walking in a dream.
I don't know that I have many helpful thoughts to share this
week. 'Don't die' is always a worthy admonition! We'll go with that.
When I got home, I didn't know how to deal with life. Still
don't. What I can't tell you could be formed into a list so exhaustive that I
don't know anyone who would read it.
What I can tell you is this, that God looks out for us and
wants us to experience joy.
General Conference was this weekend (#ldsconf), and I heard
no more frequent message than "you are loved, it will all be okay,"
and "you can have joy in the now no matter how hard the now is."
Anyway, food for thought. It's a good day to be happy! (:
Love you all,
Naomi
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